Eshaan Joshi
He/Him
Editor-in-Chief, Strikebreaker, Labor Law Violator
Who the hell knows, Sometime this decade
Bio
Affable idiot with a pen
Fun fact
Also known as the Dumbest Boy Alive
Location
Cohon University Center, Third Floor
Contact
evj@andrew.cmu.edu
Latest
A Letter from the Editor
I was on break :)
A Letter from the Editor
readme was nominated for several dozen awards over the last week, including several "Best News Source" awards for their coverage of the War in Vietnam. Unfortunately, after the Pullitzer committee discovered the Vietnam War ended in the 70s, and readme was just two asian guys in the UC at 4 in the morning, all the awards were revoked, and the prize money confiscated.
With midterm season over, readme staffers have begun to feel joy and some emotions other than stress and pain. However, they've also stopped being funny, so the editorial staff has started employing torture methods like the …
A Letter from the Editor
Following a disappointing showing from readme in the first issue, we were going to fire the entire editorial staff and replace them all with variants of ChatGPT. We are told this will cut costs and raise profits, but unfortunately, due to labor laws, immigration laws, marriage laws, and regular old laws, we were unable to do that. We are currently litigating in court to be the world's first AI only magazine. We do have some corrections to issue from Issue #1 though. We'd first like to apologize for forgetting to credit on Evie Parke with the icon for the organization. …
readme returns!
Hello! We're readme, a reestablished student-run satire magazine at the one and only Carnegie Mellon University! We were originally founded in 1992, when Jim McDougal, Terry Former, Elle Forest, and that Scooter "Skip" Hoodwinkle decided to meet in the deep recesses of the Doherty A level and think up an idea nobody had ever thought about before could Carnegie Mellon students be funny? Unfortunately, during this meeting, Skip cracked the first ever joke told on CMU campus, leading to two hospitalizations and the death of Jim McDougal from excessive laughter. The tragic result of this meeting delayed the …
10 Reasons readme is better than The Tartan
1) Better at news
Unlike The Tartan, which operates on the ideas that journalism should be "fair" and "unbiased", readme is the only campus news source that includes fun quips interesting comments, and other eccentricities.
2) Better words
Find me a single example of the Tartan using the word "eccentricites". You can't. We're simply better.
3) Lack of a sports section
Considering how much we here at Carnegie Mellon dislike sports, atheltics, and the general existence of nonacademic endeavours, readme stays true to the original vision of Carnegie Mellon by ignoring any and all sports …